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Kris Mole's avatar

We really are all pretty much the same, aren't we? I did a similar trip down memory lane last year. Took my wife to the town where I grew up, stood in front of the old house, remembered similar experiences to the ones you've described here, walked across the fields (the South Downs) that I grew up running over, picking blackberries and finding the occasional horse's skull. Had similar feelings to the ones you've written about.

Also, can't remember the name of the story, but it's the one in Dubliners about the schoolboys who bunk off school for the day and take a ferry to a little island, if I remember correctly, and find themselves in conversation with what we used to call a dirty old man, but these days would be called a paedo. That story lives rent free in my head ever since I read it, years and years ago, for just how real it is. Dubliners is one of my favourite books, if I didn't have so many new books on the to-read list I'd go back and read ir again today.

Good post as always, Tom. Cheers.

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Tom Pendergast's avatar

Selby’s new to me… I’ll check him out.

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Tom Pendergast's avatar

Yeah, luckily wisdom and beauty have no connection, do they?

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Kris Mole's avatar

Having an abundance of one means the other is oftentimes not necessary. I think. Maybe one comes after the other. I'll tell you when I acquire either.

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Tom Pendergast's avatar

Well I hope his writing is good because he’s not gonna win any beauty contests

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Kris Mole's avatar

Meow!

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Kris Mole's avatar

He acknowledges it himself tbf: https://youtube.com/shorts/RC0Cnoi6B-g?si=wjsf4TThGTUawL03 😬

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Tom Pendergast's avatar

Good to hear from you mate. It’s funny those books (and memories) that live on in our heads, isn’t it? I recall vaguely the one from Dubliners you mentioned … I really should go back and give it a look.

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Kris Mole's avatar

I'm always telling myself that I'll sit down one day soon and spend a day collecting my favourite short stories into a compilation I can put on the Kindle. But never get round to it. I'd open with that one, it just feels like an opener. I'm reading Hubert Selby's Last Exit to Brooklyn at the moment. Faaaaaaking hell, it's so good when really it shouldn't be, my brain is going into overdrive trying to work out how he does it. I've downloaded his whole bibliography now, so I guess my free time's gonna be taken up for quite some time. Each time I discover a writer that can do to me with words what this guy is doing, it's always bittersweet, as on the one hand it's giving me that feeling again that I might be ready to finally try and start writing again (my mind's not been in a creative enough place since back-to-school, and on the other hand it just leaves me feeling that I could never in a million years write anything even remotely close in depth and quality to what Selby's mind churned out onto the page. You ever read any of his stuff? I've seen the film Requiem For A Dream a few times, but had never thought about who might've written it.

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Katharine Strange's avatar

This is just lovely. I've always been intimidated by Joyce, but you're making me curious!

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Tom Pendergast's avatar

Hey, thanks Katharine. I bet you'll be surprised if you dip into that online link and read "Araby." It's not difficult at all. Now Ulysses ... that's a different story. But this story collection is really straightforward.

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Rebecca Holden's avatar

I've never read any Joyce - but oh gosh, now I want to!

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Tom Pendergast's avatar

Wow, and I would have pegged you as a Joyce reader. Dip into Joyce with "Araby" and see if you like it, and then read the whole collection. Ulysses is a test for whether you're a serious grad student or not; don't start there, whatever you do. Unless you're Terry Freedman. He could probably pull it off.

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Rebecca Holden's avatar

I’ve noticed that it’s available via Libby at my local library, so I’m going to give it a go. Thank you so much for the recommendation!

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Tom Pendergast's avatar

Also, the link I put in the post was to a free online version of the whole collection. But Libby … I use it all the time.

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Rob Kay's avatar

It was the Phelan or Felan bros. who used to stone us on our way to school.

"Phelan is an Irish surname, one of the two most common anglicisations (the other being Whelan) of the Irish surname Ó Faoláin (which comes from the Irish for "wolf"). The name is commonly seen in the south-east of Ireland, particularly counties Waterford and Kilkenny. Other anglicised forms include, Felan and Faelan."

Tough young Irish tinkers. Probably came to a bad end. Never mind, I soon learned to box properly, and never let anyone get the better of me again, one to one. In the streets or behind the bike sheds.

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Tom Pendergast's avatar

Do we all have our bullies? I don’t know anybody who admits to being one. I got sweet revenge on our local bully years later when I was working undercover security at a local store and I busted this guy and hauled him back to the security office. It was only when he told me his name that I recognized him … the story gets better from there, but maybe I’ll save that for a future post. When I think of those guys, I still think “Those fuckers.”

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Rob Kay's avatar

I think in those days we did all have bullies, this was the 1950's, and as we say in Scotland: "What disnae kill ye, makes ye stronger'. Luckily I was not a weakling and soon put on muscle. I had no fear, just respect and common sense to run away when things went mental. What's more I always backed up the weaker kids, and took on the bullies.

In public health terms, this is known as 'strengthen the host' - or more brutally, "toughen up, or die" :

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC4368196/

Ideally growing up would be less confrontational, but in terms of human history, the weaklings were always the first to go under, and I'm afraid that we cannot beat the laws of nature.

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Tom Pendergast's avatar

I generally took the same approach Rob, and lucked out by being bigger and stronger than most. Until I met my wife.

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Susan Curtis's avatar

I love this essay for so many reasons. Thanks for writing it! I just returned from a week in Iowa near where I spent the first 18 years of my life. Made pilgrimages to familiar haunts--haunt being the operative word. I love how you found meaning through Joyce. Wow!

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Tom Pendergast's avatar

I’m so glad you liked it. I bet that was a haunting!

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Good Humor by CK Steefel's avatar

Heartwarming. I resonate with your description of returning to the home where you grew up. I’ve done this. It’s a bizarre experience. Beautiful piece.

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Tom Pendergast's avatar

Thanks Carissa

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Terry Freedman's avatar

I loved this essay, Tom,but on the few occasions I've revisited old haunts it has felt rather sad. I think of all the characters and characteristics of the area that none of the current residents know about. I think of it in the other direction too. Last week my lady wife and I were watching tv, and I said to her, "Just think. In 50 years' time there will be another couple sitting here, watching holovision or whatever has been invented by then, and they will know nothing of us or our lives." We sat for a moment or two, and then laughed.

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Tom Pendergast's avatar

I’ve never felt sad going back, at least not yet. But I’m not very prone to sadness. It is odd to think of others living in “our” house, for sure. Glad you liked it Terry.

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Ross Bentley's avatar

Love this. Funny, but I’ve been reliving many memories from my childhood lately. For some reason, I’ve had more than a few old friends either reconnect with me, or just pop into my head, and each time a memory of a place is attached.

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Tom Pendergast's avatar

Really fun to be transported back, isn’t it?

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Jim Cummings's avatar

Wonderful, Tom. It's amazing how I can reread a book from 30-40 years ago, of which I have only hazy memories and immediately remember the prose and the way it made me feel way back when. I have not read Araby but I will put it at the top of my TBR list. Thank you for this.

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Bryan Padrick's avatar

'Araby' is one of my favourite stories of all time - and I'd forgotten it until now! One of the downsides of reading constantly is that room has to be made for new stories - but the upside is that when I now go and read 'Araby' tonight it'll be like visiting that friend I haven't seen in years, but the catch-up feels like we last talked yesterday. Great story, and a great post about memory and consciousness. Two of my favourite interests.

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Tom Pendergast's avatar

Oh boy, I think you’re in for a treat. But you never know, do you? Re-reading Araby made me think of some other favorites that haven’t landed. I went back just yesterday and re-read some Raymond Carver stories and they just fell flat for me. The things that sent off fireworks in my head when I was in my 20s just kind of fizzled now, felt like gimmicks. In a way, Carver tries to do what Joyce did at the end of Araby … he just doesn’t do it as well. Writing well is so bloody hard!!!

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Terry Freedman's avatar

I was on a creative writing course a year before the pandemic, and I asked the tutor what makes Carver stories so good in her opinion. It was a genuine question, to which her response was "Well if you don't like his writing that's fine." It's disappointing sometimes when one spots the gimmicks, as you put it it, but for me the real questions are: as a reader can I enjoy the stories without having the literary devices intruding, and as a writer can I employ the same devices just as effectively. Ideally, the answers should be yes and no respectively.

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Bryan Padrick's avatar

Absolutely - and when something is written really well it looks SO easy. The great irony!

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Kathleen Clare Waller's avatar

Well isn’t this a wonderful treat. Living literature. So pleased that a return to “Araby” touched you on this way, Tom!

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Graham Strong's avatar

I've never read this -- actually, the only Joyce I've made it through is The Portrait of the Artist as a Young Man. I've read much of Ulysses via audiobook, but haven't finished it yet...

Amazing though how the story of a place and time an ocean and a century away can trigger memories of your own hometown! If that doesn't represent a "universal" story, I don't know what does... lol

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Tom Pendergast's avatar

Oh Graham, I’m sure you’ll love it. The whole collection is good, but “Araby” really has a special place for me (and it’s short!)

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Graham Strong's avatar

It is now on my list!

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Carole Conn's avatar

Wow Tom, I got hooked when you talked about going back to see the Michigan home where you were living when you were growing up and I couldn’t stop reading till the very end. Such a powerful discussion of the ambiguities that surround us. Wow!

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Carole Conn's avatar

Wow Tom! I got hooked by your story of going back to see the Michigan home where you lived as a kid growing up. I couldn’t stop reading to the very end. Your discussion of the ambiguities that surround us leaves me

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Tom Pendergast's avatar

Thanks so much Carole!

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Mark R DeLong's avatar

Oh, Tom, this is the best thing I've read for weeks. I had drinks with a student of mine from the 1980s (!), and he recalled how deeply "Araby" impressed him, changed him even. I had assigned it in class, in large part because of that gripping conclusion. How it seemed to touch my own memory; how it seemed to touch so many readers' experiences.

Thank you for this.

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Tom Pendergast's avatar

Thanks Mark, so glad you had a good experience with that story too. I’m hoping to use it with some middle school kids this fall, and I wonder how the language will sit with them.

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Juliette's avatar

I have not read this but this makes me want to! Thank you.

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