16 Comments

Thank you again for your very kind and generous post. I'm really happy you enjoyed mine.

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Love the idea of “out over my skis.”

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I was very moved by Amy Yuki Vickers’ piece. She gives a rare and articulate orientation of her inner world, which is unique yet familiar and relevant to me. I look forward to reading more from both of you...thanks.

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Beautifully done, Tom.

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Honesty is what makes the difference between good and bad writing, I believe.

Good post, Tom, and thanks for the recommendation. Strong essay from Amy.

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Yeah, this is a question I've explored in my own writing. How much information is too much information?

The conclusion I've come to is that the boundaries are more often gridded out by the writer, not the reader. Sure, there are exceptions. There are those who have lived so far on the edge that their stories can be hard to read.

For the writer, it comes down to admitting truths. Where do we draw the line? Are we "cowards" if we choose not to share or are we simply sensible? I'm a strong believer that we all need our secrets to keep. And if we are happy with the stories we tell ourselves, maybe that patina is best left in place unchipped...?

Of course, that's the thing about living out over your skis -- the only way you know if you've gone too far is when you get snow-burned cheeks.

Great insights as usual, Tom.

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May 7, 2023Liked by Tom Pendergast

It's easy for us to see the world the way we have defined it, or want to define it. The concept that "that we’re all operating from a different “playbook.” is spot on for me. I am not good and seeing what in a person's life make them react the way they do, or say the things they do. I'm very quick to think they are wrong or should be seeing it my way. It takes an "adult" way of thinking that I too am working on. No one told me this is what happens in your 50's. That you start reimagining what your life could be if you were a little more patient, or understanding, or tolerant. Not that this is happening quickly for me, but it's a good reminder all the same. Thanks for the deep thoughts Tom. Now I gotta go read Amy's essay.

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May 16, 2023Liked by Tom Pendergast

I picked up the book "The Art of the Personal Essay" at a book sale for a dollar and the long introductory chapter grapples with exactly this. It's been enlightening but also, reading it has become my own personal procrastination to actually sitting down and writing and grappling with unclear feelings that I don't know I have until I'm staring at a screen and all these thoughts come spilling out.

Great read Tom!

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